Scraps into Squares

Back in the busier days of December, I knew that I would have a stretch of unstructured time in January.  How would I fill the time?   I dreamed of writing poems, maybe making a few submissions.  I knew I would fill some of the time with reading.  I thought it was likely I would do some quilting, since it was the activity I turned to in December as I had "free" time.

For much of yesterday, I spent my time sewing small scraps together into larger squares.

I'm using scraps that I would ordinarily have thrown away as too small to continue creating with them.  It's an interesting continuation of a process I started at Thanksgiving.  At first, I was creating a log cabin pattern, but now I'm open to other possibilities.  At first, I wanted to pay no attention to color, but now I let myself do that.  Some squares will be created because I had fabric that fit the shape, and some because I cut fabric that would match the surrounding pieces.  

The goal, however, remains to end with a square of roughly 12 inches.

As I have stitched, listening to NPR or podcasts or watching a movie for free on Amazon (The Devil Wears Prada, which I loved when it first came out, but now I find myself cringing for several reasons:  toxic workplace, young writer abandoning her ideals, young workers set up to fail).  Part of me feels guilty--shouldn't I be doing something more productive?  I have more quilts than someone living in an age of global warming will ever need.

But it's creative and it's calming and I'm enjoying it.  I know that it won't always be this way;  I won't always have time/interest/motivation/space.  Decades of creative life have taught me that when I am feeling pulled into a creative activity, I should follow that impulse.  There will be plenty of days to come when I will look at my fabric piles and shrug.  Now my fingers itch to sew. 

I have plans to go to a museum or two, but yesterday I decided to stay put because it was supposed to rain buckets.  I have written a poem and made a submission.  I'm not passing up on money-making opportunities to sit and sew.  I'm not neglecting my responsibilities.  Yet still this sense of guilt nips at me.

I'm ignoring that nip of guilt.  I need to create 30 squares for the quilt top that I have in mind.  Let me sew scraps together, while I can.