Saturday, January 4, 2020

Saturday Snapshots: The End of the Holiday Season

--I don't wish it was a week ago.  No, I have my standard early January wish--if only it could be seven weeks ago, when we still had our delightful Thanksgiving plans to look forward to, when the delights of Christmas still seemed very far away.

--Most people in my immediate social circle have been commenting on what a good holiday season we've just had.  I, too, have been surprised by how well the holiday season has treated us, from the small gatherings to the travel to the larger gatherings.  I have gone into typical analysis mode:  "Why did this work so well and how can I duplicate it?"  I don't have answers right now.

--It reminds me of my younger years as a long distance runner.  When I'd have one of those rare effortless runs, I'd try to think about what I had been eating, how many hours I slept, how could I position myself to get more of those runs?

--My online classes start today.  If I was queen of the education universe, I would declare that a school term could only start on a Monday.

--There were times before Thanksgiving when I marveled at how I no longer seemed to have a sweet tooth.  Ah hubris--that sweet tooth has decided to show me who is boss in the past few weeks.  I would be happy if I could consume these kinds of sweets without consequence.  Sadly, I am already seeing consequences.  I don't even want to think about the pounds I've put on.

--I will continue to try to course correct on my own.  A week from Tuesday, I leave to go to my first on-ground intensive for my certificate in spiritual direction, so I don't want to make grand resolutions that I will immediately break during that time away.  But I am prepared to do a shred in late January if need be.

--There are many events I should write about, perhaps, events with real weight (pun intended).  I'm hesitant to write about the split/schism that seems unavoidable for our Methodist friends since I'm not a Methodist.  There's the assassination in Iran that seems to be a portent of a ratcheting up of hostilities, a horse or a rider or some other symbol of apocalypse.  I suspect there will be many more opportunities to talk about heavier topics in the days to come.

--It's been a strange work week, a mix of gently easing back into rhythms and the amping up of those rhythms.  On Monday, we had no internet and no e-mail.  I could still access some Word and Excel documents, so it wasn't a total loss.  By the end of the week, it was back to analyzing numbers and some of the other tasks which don't come as naturally to me.

--I've also been thinking back to my first months on this particular job.  I'm remembering how it was terrifying:  I didn't make a lateral move to take this job, and I moved forward in faith that I had the gifts and skills that would be necessary, since I didn't have the full range of experience that I would have had with other job shifts.  I miss the exhilaration of realizing that I could do these tasks, that I wasn't going to crash and burn.  I miss the days when if there were naysayers, I didn't know about them.  I am already weary of the "Why does this have to be so hard?" feeling that has come crashing back post-holiday.

--But let me not get bogged down in work weariness.  Let me record this idea that I had yesterday and recorded in a Facebook post:  " So, this week-end, I want to create a to-go bag, a creativity kit. I want a sketchbook and a collection of markers. I want my poet tarot deck of cards. I want an inspiring book that I can read in short snippets. I want a perfect pen. If I carried these things with me all the time, where would I be by this time next year?"  One of my friends said, "Like a sewing kit, only for writing?"  Yes, sort of like that.  But maybe I'd even have some fabric.

--I want to have more creativity in my life, but I'm not sure I want to lug my laptop everywhere.  I want to make it easier to take creative opportunities with me.  I want to take advantage of chunks of time that I didn't necessarily anticipate.

--But I'd also like to get my novel written, and I haven't figured out the best way to do that.

--Because the liturgical calendar is always in my brain, let me also note that we close in on Epiphany, that time of wise ones following a star and sidestepping murderous kings and other agents of empire.  A year ago, I'd have been writing the poem "Border Lands," which is one of my favorite poems that I wrote in 2019.  It came from a series of sketches:



with color added:



I was pondering the crisis at the border and Epiphany and the crisis that brought about the end of the wall in Germany and the poem bubbled up.  On Monday, which is the true feast of the Epiphany, I'll post the poem.

No comments: