Living the Dream!

I am distracted by the beauty of the snow.  I woke up at one point in the night and nothing had fallen, and then, an hour or two later, we'd gotten a dusting.  A few hours ago, we may have had an inch, but barely.  And now, there's enough snow on the patio table to make snow cream later.  We are forecast to get 3-6 inches before the snow ends tonight, and I think we've already gotten 3 inches.  Let me go measure.

We are at 2.25 inches, and as promised, the snow is light and fluffy--hopefully less likely to break branches and power lines.  I plan to make snow cream later; we've never had enough snow to do that before.  I saw a weather story on a Fox news Facebook site that gave recipes for snow cream, along with the advice that this recipe is an eat right away recipe, not a save for later recipe.  My first thought:  "People save snow cream for later?"

But I'm not here just to write about the weather.  Let me record some other parts of the week that I don't want to slip away.

--I got my teaching schedule for Fall, which includes three Creative Writing type classes:  Journalism Workshop I, Creative Writing (a 200 level class), and Studies in Nonfiction. More than once yesterday afternoon, I thought, I am living one of the dreams of my younger self, who yearned to teach more creative writing.

--Before she assigned me the Journalism class, my department chair reached out to me by way of e-mail to see if I'd be open to teaching it.  Here's what I wrote back:  "I am open to that, although I haven't taught it. But long ago, in my Newberry College undergrad days, I was an essential part of the student newspaper. We went looking for hot stories, a la Woodward and Bernstein. We never found them, but we had fun just the same."

--Yesterday one of my Fall English 101 students asked me to read his short story he'd been working on, and I did.  I also had an interview with a student who was supposed to interview someone working in a field he would be interested in as a career--another English faculty member referred him to me when he said he wanted to be a published writer.  It was a great interview.  And again, I thought, I am living the dream--of both my younger self and my current self. 

And now, I'm living the dream of having seasons and a beautiful snow.  Let me go out and explore!

Yearly Intentions Report: The Poem Revision Edition

You would think that with two snow days this week, three actually counting cancelled church on Sunday, I wouldn't feel desperate for some early morning writing time.  And yet, at 1:30 when I couldn't fall back asleep, I decided to get up for a bit.  I've enjoyed this early morning writing time so much that I didn't go back to sleep.

I've done a bit of writing in my offline journal.  I went to my first online class for this semester, the one I'm taking not teaching, the Lutheran Foundations class at United Lutheran Seminary.  I wanted to do some offline journaling about my anxiety around the class, anxieties that have turned out to be mainly scheduling and logistics anxiety.  Those anxieties lifted a bit, at least for this week, as the class progressed yesterday.  It also helped to write about it.

Then I turned my attention to a poem I've been revising.  I first started writing it on January 15.  I was inspired by Jan Richardson's poem about wise women also coming to the baby Jesus.  Here's the first stanza I created, as originally written, complete with automatic capitalization that I go back to correct as I revise:

The women stay behind
While the wise men head west,
Following a star,
Hoping for regime change
Or at the very least, control
Of the narrative. The women melt
The old candles into something new.

On January 24, I did some work on the poem, enough work to justify creating a new document that I labeled as an intermediate draft.  Here's the intermediate revision:

The wise women stay behind.
The wise men head west,
following a star,
hoping for regime change
or at the very least, control
of the narrative.

The women keep
the lamps lit. In the long winter
afternoons, they melt
the old candles into something new.
The children decorate the new creations
while the grandmothers
tell their tales and fill
their hearts with hope.

This morning, I decided that it was time to actually finish the draft.  I was partly inspired by the end of the month approaching and my intention to end the year with 52 finished drafts.  I was successful, and then I thought about revising another poem--that would mean I am on track for the year, not slightly behind.  

I've decided that my intention to finish drafts can extend to rough drafts written before 2026, so I went back to my folder of rough drafts.  I pulled out a rough draft from December, about Noah's wife looking at Realtor.com and seeing her old house.  I should be able to finish that revision by tomorrow.  I'm waiting to see if some final lines come to me today as my brain works on the ending.

New Bishops, New Weather Reports

Once again, I am looking at weather reports.  But I'm also looking at pictures of the installation service (right term?) for Sarah Mullally, the new Archbishop of Canterbury, the head of the Anglican church worldwide.  These pictures were posted widely on Facebook, so I'm hoping it's O.K. to post them here.  

Posted at the St. Paul's Cathedral Facebook Site

In this context, I mean Anglican as in the Church of England, not the group that broke away because the Church of England is too radical.  Ordaining women would be seen as evidence of that radicalism, not to mention choosing a woman to lead the whole church.

Posted at the St. Paul's Cathedral Facebook site

I'm struck by how young she is in terms of her career as a pastor.  She had a career as a cancer nurse before her ordination in 2002; she was in her first bishop position in 2015.  She was born in 1962, so some folks (me) might see her as young, while others might sigh and wish for even younger leadership.

Posted on the Canterbury Cathedral Facebook page

The above picture first grabbed my attention.  What must it be like to be the stonecarver, engraving her name into the wall?  Does one have to work up to that position?

And what must it be like to be the one to see their name on the wall?

It's a tough time to come to leadership, but one thing my Church History class taught me is that it's always a tough time to be a bishop or an Archbishop or even a pastor.  I'm hoping for easy weather for her, for all of us.

Snow Days Come to an End

Today our snow day mini-vacation comes to a close, albeit with qualifications:  if the road conditions are unsafe, just let your instructor/supervisor know.  I've already had several e-mails from students.  I thought about writing such an e-mail myself, but I went for a walk yesterday afternoon, and the roads were clear and dry.

I'm still adjusting my lesson plans for the rest of the week.  I'll give my morning class, the English 101 both today and Friday to write their essays, and we'll do peer editing on Monday.  My two afternoon classes are English 102 classes.  I'm leaning towards doing the same class and in-person daily writing on both today and Friday--students can choose which one to attend.  Those who can't make it today aren't penalized, and neither are those who made an extra effort to make it back.  And it keeps my MWF classes more in sync with the TT classes than other approaches.  It's an experiment, and if it doesn't work beautifully, it's not a huge deal.  And it may give me insight.

I have gotten a lot done during these snow days--not all that I thought about getting done, but enough.  I even pulled out the shop vac yesterday and vacuumed up some of the spots that are impossible with a broom.  

I haven't gotten as much exercise as I might have, had the roads been passable before yesterday afternoon.  But that's O.K. too--it would be better if I had been eating more sensibly, but that's O.K. too.  I have managed to stay calm and less anxious, without drinking or going for a walk, two of the coping techniques I'm most likely to use when I'm feeling anxious.

To be clear, eating treats is also one of my most used coping techniques in dealing with anxiety, so I've used that strategy more than I might have otherwise.  I've also tried writing in my offline journal, another effective technique.

It will be good to get back into my regular schedule--albeit a regular schedule that's about to change with tomorrow's first Lutheran Confessions class.  I did spend some time with the course materials yesterday.  The syllabus gives more insight about the writing expectations than I realized when I wrote yesterday's blog post.  The writing looks very manageable.  I read the assignment in the textbook yesterday morning--a delightful book.  I have not yet opened The Book of Concord, which I predict I will not like as much.  I just don't find pre-20th century theology as appealing as the theology that comes later.

Posted late because . . .

Snow Days and School Days and Anxiety

This morning, I'm feeling oddly anxious.  I have much less reason to feel anxious this week than last.  The ice storm wasn't as bad as we feared it might be.  I had been worried that the seminary class that I'm taking starts Thursday, and I haven't gotten a Zoom link or seen a course shell uploaded in Canvas--this morning, it's there.  We have power, internet, and water, and I have another remote learning day today, so I don't have to worry about the roads.  My spouse had jury duty today--also cancelled.

So why the anxiety?

I've been trying to get to the bottom of my anxiety, trying to understand.  I'm sure part of my anxiety stems from my schedule ramping back up again--so, even though this week includes some extra time at home, most weeks won't be like this.  I've also been feeling anxiety about taking another seminary class with worries about all that could go wrong trying to take root in my brain.  What if the Zoom link doesn't work?  What if the class requires too much of me?  What if this class is the one that breaks me?

I do have to laugh at myself.  I've been taking online classes for 5 years, and I've never run into problems I couldn't solve.  I explored the course shell, and the assignments look manageable.  I have the textbooks.  And then there's the larger situation:  I'm not a 25 year old, just starting out on my life's journey.  I have a full-time job that doesn't depend on this seminary class.

My anxiety might also be sadness masquerading as anxiety.  Why am I sad?  Well, I've enjoyed these snow days, even as I felt anxious about all the ice that might fall.  I'm sad to see this snow vacation come to an end, sad even as I have at least one more day to enjoy.

Let me make a list of some moments that I don't want to slip away:

--I've enjoyed the cooking we've done,  from the seafood stew on Saturday to last night's homemade pizza made in cast iron pans.  I've baked bread, both an oatmeal bread on Saturday and a pumpkin bread this morning.

--We watched Sinners on Saturday--what an amazing movie!  If it hadn't gotten so much Oscar buzz, I might have skipped it, thinking it would be too gory a horror movie.  Thankfully, the gory parts weren't too gross, and the horror bits weren't haunting.

--I've done a lot of sewing and sorting of fabric.  I decided that I was ready for a change from the Christmas fabrics that I had been using, so yesterday I made the shift back to the same type of project, sewing log cabin patchwork out of scraps, but using a wider variety of fabrics.

--Yesterday I took an unintended nap.  I had laid down in the late morning to watch the glitter snow that developed in the morning but was only visible when seen through sunshine.  The trees gleamed through their ice glaze.  Next thing I knew, I was waking up from a deep kind of nap.

Snow Days, Grown Up Style

So far, we've continued to have electricity, internet, and water as the various weather systems swirl around us.  This morning, the wind is howling, and I've already heard a transformer pop, which only resulted in a tiny flicker of the lights.  Our luck may not hold, but I'm not afraid of being without power for hours or days the way I was last week.  There was a tree that went down in our neighborhood yesterday, taking a power line with it.  It only affected the lower part of the neighborhood, and it only took 90 minutes for power to be restored.

We are still stuck in the house, which I expected.  The precipitation that we got was mostly ice and freezing rain, which means that outdoor surfaces are a solid sheet of ice, which again makes me feel fortunate to have power.  We were lucky that the freezing rain shifted to regular rain Sunday afternoon and that the temperature stayed just above freezing during the afternoon and much of the night.

My school has canceled in-person classes both today and tomorrow.  They'll make a decision about Wednesday before noon tomorrow, but I may not be able to make it in regardless.  On MWF, I leave my house for campus before sunrise, and we are expecting a time of bitterly cold weather, which means the frozen stuff will still be with us.

I've been trying to make good use of my time.  I created a worship time for my congregation in Bristol (live streamed by way of Facebook, then put on my YouTube channel for those who don't use Facebook)--if you want more thoughts on this process, you can read this post on my theology blog.  I still have some work to do on my course shells for Spartanburg Methodist College, but I did get documents uploaded.  Maybe today and tomorrow I can get gradebooks set up.  I sent out e-mails and created announcements for my online classes that started last week.  I did some sewing and some poem writing and some sending out of poems and some cooking.

How lovely to think that I have two more days of this.  How lovely that I am not desperate to leave the house.

Hurricane Prep, Winter Storm Prep

It's been an interesting process, preparing for this widespread winter storm.  In some ways, it's reminded me of hurricane prep, especially in terms of making sure we have the supplies that we need, in case we're cut off from the world for several days.  

But of course, a winter storm is different than a hurricane.  I haven't been worried about the perishable food in the refrigerator--if we lose power, we can put the food outside.  I have been researching carbon monoxide risks with a propane heater that's rated for indoor use, something we never would have needed in South Florida.

Just like with a hurricane, it's hard to know what part of the storm will arrive with what intensity.  So far, we're doing fairly well here, but that could change this afternoon.  And let me be clear, when I say we're doing fairly well here, I am not leaving the house because of the wintry mix that fell and keeps falling and the slick surfaces.  But we have electricity, and so far, the tree branches seem to be their normal shape.

I have gotten most of my information through various online weather sites, not the TV news.  I wonder if the coverage is the same kind of intensity as hurricane approaching coverage.  One of my colleagues at Spartanburg Methodist was so freaked out by it all that she left town, and there was a moment when I wondered if she took the wiser approach.  If the ice had been thicker, if we were out of power for a week or more, I'd say that she was the smart one.  I may yet--we still have hours of precipitation yet to fall.

I do wonder how much of my jitteriness has also been because of Hurricane Helene.  I filled up the stock pot with water, to go with some of our jugs of water left over from Helene--just in case the water system goes down.  Before Hurricane Helene, I wouldn't have thought I needed to worry about that here in the mountains.

I'm glad we decided to cancel worship.  I would not have been able to make it across the mountain, and I am guessing that the roads in Bristol, Tennessee are as bad or worse than they are here.  

My spouse suggested that I do an abbreviated worship, and so I experimented with that this morning.  I did a Facebook Live broadcast on my Facebook page, and then I captured the video so that I could put it on my YouTube channel (you can view it here).  The Facebook post has already gotten more views than almost anything else I've done there.  I don't really know what counts as a view, so I am not reading too much into this.

I'll close with a prayer I wrote for the Sunday devotional time:  

Creator God, as we wait for the storms to pass, give us patience and strength. Help us to remember that you are with us in every kind of weather, both the literal weather and the other types of storms that threaten us. Inspire us to be the light of the world, today and every day.

Epiphany Stars and Haiku-like Creations

It is lovely to have a morning where I'm not racing around doing storm prep.  Yesterday I decided that I should leave even earlier than my usual MWF time of 7:15-7:30, so I was out the door just after 6.  I was able to get more gas for the car and stop by the grocery store one last time.  It turned out to be a wise decision.  I was able to get some ice melt granules, the ingredients for the seafood stew (recipe here) I want to cook today, and treats.

I wasn't sure what to expect in terms of student attendance yesterday.  Thursday night, the e-mail announcing distance learning on Monday went out.  I decided that I would hold class as normal, to respect the students who did come to class.  My 9 a.m. class was only missing 2 students, the normal absence rate.  By my afternoon class, the e-mail from the school president had gone out, telling students that we're looking at a significant ice storm and that they should go home if possible.  Still, I decided to have class.

Let me record the poetry writing experiment that I did with my English 102 students.  

On Wednesday, we looked at versions of the arrival of the Magi, which I described in this blog post.  Yesterday, I brought in poems inspired by the text, along with epiphany stars with words on the back.  

I began by having them choose three stars and writing the words on a piece of colored paper that I gave them.  I then talked about the ways I've used the stars as a pastor, the ways I describe in this post.  I had them think about the words while I passed out the first poem, Jan Richardson's "Wise Women Also Came."  As I read the poem, I had the students underline words and phrases that struck them for any reason, at least three.  We did the same thing with T.S. Eliot's "The Journey of the Magi."  We also had a bit of conversation.

I gave each student three more stars, and then we returned to the yellow sheets of paper.  I had them write one of the lines that they had underlined on the yellow paper.  Then they wrote one of the new star words.  Then they wrote words that rhymed with the star word or words that started with the same letter.  They wrote another line from the poem that they had underlined and another star word.  Then they wrote a New Year's resolution, theirs or someone else's.  Then another line from the poems and another star word.  I put this sentence on the board (You will ___________) and asked them to imagine that they met a wise sage that could foretell the future from the stars; what would they want the sage to fill in the blank or to say to them?  Then I had them write another line from the poem.

Now they had a lot of stuff on the yellow paper, and we moved to the condensing part of the creation process.  I showed them my collage with the haiku-like creation I created a few weeks ago with my neighborhood friend and creativity partner:

Here's the haiku-like creation that I wrote:

Wise ones return home
but by a different way
empire's long shadow.

I do tell them that there's so much more to haiku than just the syllable count, but for now, we're only focusing on syllables, as a way to try condensing ideas and lines into something that might be more profound, but it doesn't have to be.

We took the last 10 minutes of class for students to try their hand.  They came up with some interesting short/haiku-like creations.  If I had more time, it would be interesting to add collaging to this process, to see if images prompt anything different.

This experience has been so fruitful that I'm adding it to my list of possibilities for my creative writing class.  

And now, since the day is not going to improve in terms of weather, let me go out on a walk.  I am not likely to have a chance to walk outside again for the next few days, in the storm and its aftermath.

More on Storm Prep, More on Classroom Collaging

My brain snapped awake at 1:30, and for awhile, I tried to fall back asleep.  Finally around 2 or so, I thought, I recognize what my brain is doing--I recognize this pattern from Hurricane Watch days.  I want to see if the track has shifted, even though I don't need to do much if it has.  I want to see what various forecasters and commenters are saying, even if they're all saying the same thing.

I thought about the food in the freezer, which happily, is less food than we had in the freezer 6 weeks ago; we've made a concentrated effort to eat what we have.  I thought about what we might make tomorrow to use even more of it, so that if we lose power, we don't lose as much food.  My brain started making a grocery list.

Of course, if we lose power in an ice storm (unlike in a hurricane) we could put the food outside, where the temps are expected to be low through next week.

Finally, I decided to just get up.  Let me capture a success story from my Advanced Creative Writing class.  The collaging that I described in this blog post went so well that I decided to expand on it.

I got to class early and moved tables so that we had 9 tables against the walls.  I put a collage on each table, along with a stack of feedback worksheets, and an envelope.  The worksheets asked students to tell what colors are predominant, what words they noticed, what images were prominent and what larger symbolic meaning they might have,  what story ideas the collage inspired, and other insight that the collage viewer has for the collage maker.

I had students sit at the table with their collage first.  I had them write a bit about what they saw now, with the benefit of 48 hours of being away from the collage, of coming to it with fresh eyes.  Then I had them get up and move to the next table.

We did the same process across 8 collages.  First I had students stare at the collage for 30-60 seconds without writing anything; I was surprised by how many students had trouble with this aspect.  Then I had them fill in the worksheet for 4-5 minutes.  Some students zipped through this part, while others had trouble getting all the feedback on paper.  I had them put the feedback sheet in the envelope that was on the table, so that they wouldn't be distracting to the next person who came to the table.

When they got back to their collage, I had them fill out the worksheet for their own collage.  And then I had them write for daily writing credit:  4 strengths, 2 weaknesses, and 1 suggestion, along with an overview of the process kind of paragraph writing.

I realize that there are some who might ask what this process has to do with creative writing.  But my students seemed to understand that it's an interesting way to access parts of their brain that might not emerge if they stared at a blank sheet of paper waiting for words to appear.

I am so grateful to be at a school where this kind of classroom experience is valued, not denigrated.  I am so grateful to be at a school where I get to teach these kinds of classes.

Tomorrow I'll say more about a poetry writing experience in English 102 classes.  But this morning, I'm leaving early so that I can stop by the grocery store.  No, not to buy milk or bread--if we're going to have a weather event, I want luxury treats like honey roasted cashews and Cadbury fruit and nut candy bars. 

A Storm's Coming Which Triggers a Quest

I got up yesterday morning thinking that I would make progress on my Faculty Annual Report which was due yesterday.  But I watched various weather forecasts and started feeling a bit anxious about the threat of ice this week-end.  If we lose power . . .  and then my brain was racing.

We have alternate fuel sources, like the woodburning fireplace.  But it's not a great source of heat, and with the damper open, it lets in a lot of cold air.  A few years ago, we bought a small heater that is O.K. to use inside.  It runs on propane, and it needs the smaller propane canisters, not the big kind that fuels the grill.   And yes, we've tried the hose/valve set up that's supposed to be an adapter, and it doesn't work.

I did a quick count of the small propane tanks:  3.  Are there more in the shed?  I don't know.  We've ordered them from Amazon before, but when I went to order, I realized that the delivery date was next week, which won't help us if the power goes out on Saturday.

I thought about all the people who would be waking up to the possibility of a winter storm.  I thought of the blissfully ignorant people who would get to work and decide to get supplies in the afternoon.  I did a bit of searching on websites.  It looked like the Lowe's in Spartanburg had a good supply, while the Lowe's a mile from me did not.  The Lowe's in Spartanburg is easy to swing by on my way to work, so I decided to leave early.

But how early did I need to leave?  Would there be crowds?  I gave myself plenty of time.

Happily, I didn't need a lot of extra time.  The propane tanks were near the front, instead of the row where the website said I would find them.  Happily, an employee pointed me the right way.  I bought 10 tanks and wrote a text to my spouse which ended this way:   "If you think we need more, let me know.  Right now they have plenty but I imagine soon they will not."  My spouse wrote back and said that he estimated we'd have enough propane for 40 hours which would be enough.

Once I got back home in the afternoon, we went to get gas; we wanted to be sure we used our Ingles fuel points, plus I noticed that gas prices had risen since morning at one place, but not at the Ingles.  Both the Ingles gas station and the grocery store were jammed, but we did get both cars filled up.  Given my daily commute, I'll need to fill up again tomorrow, but hopefully that won't be a problem.

We used our fuel points and got our gas for 44 cents a gallon--WOW!!!

Then it was back home, and after a Zoom call, I spent the rest of the evening finishing my Faculty Annual Report.  It's a pleasant enough activity, thinking back to what went well in my teaching life in 2025.

Faith Lutheran in Bristol, Tennessee decided to cancel worship Sunday, which makes sense to me.  It looks like we will not avoid a significant winter weather event on either side of the mountain.  I suspect that Spartanburg Methodist College will cancel classes on Monday, but we likely won't know that much in advance.

My hope is that we have the gentler possibility:  some snow, but not crippling.  My real hope is that the power stays on, along with the water.  I hope to make good use of the time, but most important is to stay off the road.

Tuesday Teaching Successes: Collaging and Biblical Storytelling

Here I am, blogging before heading off to school, heading off early to go to the Spartanburg Lowe's and Home Depot in hopes of getting some of the little propane tanks for our inside heater.  Here I am, blogging even though I want to keep looking at weather maps.  Here I am, blogging, even though I have an annual report to finish.

Let me focus on what went well in yesterday's classes. 

In my Advanced Creative Writing class, we did some collaging.  I brought in a variety of magazines and had students cut/tear out words and images that appealed to them without analyzing why they chose them.  I was happy to see how focused they were on this part of the process.  Often when I do a collaging process, there's one student who finishes in 3 minutes, where everyone is just getting started.  That didn't happen yesterday--hurrah!  

I had a piece of poster board for each student, and we finished the class by gluing the materials to it.  I gave out the 4 page document that we did on Thursday and had them think about the collage and see if there were connections.  It might be about either the long term project or the shorter projects.

On Thursday, I'll put the collages out around the room and have a bit of studio time.  Between now and Thursday, I'll develop more of a class plan (in addition to checking the weather maps).  

In my English 102 class, we continued our discussion of what makes a good story and the ways we can tell a story.  This week, I'm using Bible texts, Matthew 1:18 - 2:23.  I gave them two translations of the text, the NRSVUE and The Message.  I used handouts, because it's easier.  Then I showed the same text presented by Biblical storyteller (and my seminary professor) Tracy Radosevic (you can view it here).

I had created a worksheet where for each version, they wrote the strengths and weaknesses of each version.  Then I divided them into groups to discuss.  We had a brief time discussion as a class, and then they answered question #4 on the worksheet, choosing the one version they liked best.  I urged them to think about this work as a text, not as a sacred story, which I acknowledged might be easier said than done.  They seemed able to operate at this level.

Although the energy level was low at the start, the class went well, and I ended up feeling good about it all, a good thing, since I'm teaching the same material twice today.  After class, one of my students from last term who has continued with me this term talked about how strange it was to encounter the material in English, instead of the Spanish of her home church--a wrinkle I hadn't considered, but will mention today!

But first, a stop at the Spartanburg stores on my quest for small propane tanks for the indoor heater--which means I need to get ready to leave a bit earlier than usual.

Travel Plans and Weather

I didn't plan to take a break from blogging.  In retrospect, I should have slotted in an MLK post to run yesterday, but on Sunday, I wasn't completely sure of our Sunday to Monday plans.

If you were reading this blog last week, you know that I was keeping an eye on the weather.  If you read this blog on a regular basis, you know that the weather is never far from my consciousness.  Last week, there was some possibility of a winter storm during the upcoming holiday week-end, which would have impacted my ability to travel to Bristol, Tennessee to preach and preside at Faith Lutheran.

In fact, the winter storm came, but it tracked east.  As we drove to Bristol, I kept an eye on the radar (by way of my phone app), and snow was just a few miles away.  It had already snowed at the higher elevations, but the roads seemed fine.

I also kept my eye on the radar because we planned to go to a different part of east Tennessee, for an overnight visit to my spouse's father and stepmother.  We weren't able to see them during the holidays because of my sudden need for melanoma removal surgery.  We knew that it hadn't snowed at their house.  But what about the mountains in between us?

On the way down, we didn't see much.  On our way home yesterday, we saw snow and ice in the landscape and secondary roads around Bryson City, but the highway was clear.

I'm glad we went.  We had a great visit, full of conversation and food and many hands of the card game Euchre (I'm never sure how to spell the name of that game).  I'm glad that we made the effort and that the weather/roads were better than some of the forecasting predicted.

And now, here we are, at the beginning of another week, and the weather questions are the same.  We know that a storm system will be in the southeastern states over this coming week-end.  Where will it track?  Will we get ice or snow or rain or a mix of all of them or nothing?

Once again, I won't write my sermon early.  This week, even more than last week, it looks like we've got a very good chance of cancelling church.

Fragments--So Fragmented that I'm Posting Late

I am still watching the weather, still wondering if we'll have church tomorrow.  The radar showed snow falling in Bristol this morning, with possible accumulations of 3 inches.  If the snow stops in the early afternoon and the sun comes out, warming the temps to above freezing, will it all melt off the parking lot in time?  I will stay tuned--and keep working on my sermon.

With my fragmented attention, let me capture a few bits from the week that I don't want to lose:

--I've had really good classes this week, with students paying attention and participating.  Hurrah!

--In my English 102 classes, I've been using Carolyn Forche's "The Colonel."  I often use it as a way of talking about whether a piece is a poem, a journal entry, a very short story, or something else.  I did that this week.  But I also talked about Forche's time as a human rights adviser for the U.N., and the situation in El Salvador when she was there in the late '70's.  I have concluded by making connections to Venezuela.

--It is strange how events have changed since I taught this poem in the fall.  Now we have invaded Venezuela.  In some ways, it's not a surprise.  After all, the U.S. has inserted itself in many a country, especially in Latin America.  But this time, the surprise is that the U.S. has been very covert in the past.  Not this time.

--Will Marco Rubio be the next Kissinger?  Hmm.  I'm listening to interviews (here and here) with Dexter Filkins, a writer for The New Yorker, who has just written a piece on Rubio.  Fascinating--and I'm so glad that I don't have political ambitions in this day and age.

Bingo Cards and Whiteboards: A Good First Week

I am always on the lookout for ways to get students up and out of their seats for brief periods of time, especially if it can be for something that's not dividing into small groups and discussing something, just for the sake of having small group work.  I'm not opposed to small group work, even though I hate it for myself.  But I have noticed that small group work involves a lot of prepping on my part and a lot of coaching when they are in small groups (i.e., now talk about this, now switch to talking about this).

Yesterday in my Advanced Creative Writing class, I was leading us through exercises to develop a long-term project.  I created 4 worksheets.  The first one had them list/discuss creative works/artists that had been important to them when they were children and a separate space to list creative works/artists that are important to them now.  As they were writing, I thought, I'm surrounded by whiteboards in this classroom; I could have them write their lists on the board.  And I did it.  There were only 7 students in class, so it wasn't too chaotic.  And it was interesting to see their lists.

On worksheet 2, I had them write about what types of creative works they had created in the past, both in a school setting and on their own.  One wall had two whiteboards beside each other, so I wrote a variety of types (short story, poem, novel, song, animated work, graphic novel/story, hybrid work) on the board as they were filling in the worksheet.  Then I had them put check marks in the columns if they had created that type of work.

On worksheet 3, I had them discuss the conditions that make creative work possible, like space and food.  Then we chatted a bit.  On worksheet 4, I had them list 3 potential long term projects--no commitment implied.  It was a great class, much better than what I had originally planned, which was me verbally giving them prompts.

Then I went to my English 102 class.  I had a bingo/getting to know each other sheet ready to go (see this blog post for details), and I put a blank grid on the back.  I wasn't sure what I was going to do with it, but now, I've come up with a plan for both English 101 and 102.  First, the students will move around the room, trying to fill in the getting to know each other Bingo squares.  Then they'll sit back down and use the grid on the back.  For the English 101 class that meets this morning, I'll have them fill in the grid with some details about themselves that can lead to a standard "who I am" kind of essay.  

In English 102, I used the grid for students to create a fictional character.  Some of the squares were minor, like does the character have a pet.  Some were major:  what does the character yearn for and what is keeping the character from getting that (2 squares).  Then, as we talked about what makes a story, we had character details filled in, conflict details that might lead to an interesting plot, and setting details.  It was an interesting way of talking about these aspects of fiction/story telling.  I look forward to seeing how this afternoon's English 102 classes respond.

It's been a good first week of classes, and I'm grateful.

Crystalline Shards and Fragments

I am feeling fragmented today, so let me capture some fragments:

--Part of why I'm feeling fragmented is the shifting forecast.  Will we be able to go to Bristol on Sunday?  It's very unclear.  There's a system that will likely snow on part of the Carolinas--but will it be closer to the coast?

--So, should I write a sermon?  Yes, I probably should.  And if church is cancelled this Sunday, I can probably tweak it so that it works for next week.  This Sunday is the call story of Peter and Andrew in the Gospel of John, and next week is the same story in Matthew.

--Why do we have these two call stories?  I'm assuming it's because of where the moving holidays fall, specifically Easter and the Baptism of Jesus.  

--If I have to write a sermon about each, what on earth will I say?  The Gospel of John has the words "Come and see."  The Gospel of Matthew has the fishing for humans language.

--My brain zings back to class planning.  It's not unpleasant, but it does remind me of why/how the times when I'm teaching in-person classes is SO different from the times when Spartanburg Methodist College is on a break.

--All of my classes have met for their first day.  They all feel good, with at least a few students who seem bright-eyed and ready to get going.

--So now the easy part is over.  Now I need to focus on what we're going to do each day.  I have broad ideas.  I understand why some people start the semester with day by day course plans, but I never have done that.

--If I did that, would I feel like I have more time to focus on other things?  I would feel that way, but I would probably not do the other things, like poetry writing.  

--I think about sermon writing, which I do every week.  If I had a weekly poetry assignment, like a paid column, would I be more focused week after week?  Yes, if I had a paid gig, I would.

--I think I will walk this morning.  It's going to be cold and windy all day, so I might as well walk early.  And maybe there will be snow flurries!

--I was hoping for a bit of snow yesterday afternoon, but alas.  We prepared as if there might be snow:  charging the phones, bringing the portable heater inside, making a pot of chili, that kind of thing.  Despite the lack of snow, it was cozy and nice.

--We're getting a bit more light outside, a very filtered light just before sunrise.  I think that it might be snowing now.  Or perhaps it snowed more last night than I thought.  But as I look across the trees, it does look snowy.

--When I took the last of the recycling to the curb a half hour ago, the air itself seemed crystalline. There weren't many snow flurries, but I could feel tiny shards of ice on my face--not altogether unpleasant, but not the joy of snow either.   

Report from the First Day of Class

I've been listening to a delightful interview with Virginia Evans, who wrote The Correspondent, which made it to several year-end "Best of" lists.  The New York Times Book Review had a wide ranging conversation with her.  She wrote novel after novel, which never were published, before this one.

I meet with three classes for the first time today; yesterday was a lighter day, with 2 back-to-back classes, from 12:15-1:30 and 1:40-2:55.  I felt good about them both.

The first was the Advanced Creative Writing class, a class which is new to me.  I'm used to schools that have a general Creative Writing class and from there, students can do more advanced writing classes that are genre specific, like Poetry. 

Here's what surprised me--every student in the class has had me in a previous class:  1 in the very first English 101 class that I taught at Spartanburg Methodist College (Fall 2023), 2 in the Non-Fiction Writing class I taught a year ago (Spring 2025), and 6 in the Creative Writing class last semester.  So I didn't go over a lot of basic stuff, like how to pronounce my name or where/how to find/contact me.

I liked the energy in the class, and they all seemed interested in the idea of a long project that stretches across an entire semester.  They're not likely to have this kind of opportunity many more times in their lives.  We'll do some smaller writings too.  Today during my office hours, I'll sketch out a more complete calendar to let us all know what each week will look like.  I want some time to be out of the classroom, meeting with me individually, which will give them time to write/work on the long project.

After that class I had one of the three English 102 classes that I'll be teaching.  Here, too, the energy was good.

I came home, did some grocery shopping along the way to get some more veggies to last the week, and after supper, I went over to the local library to get the books on hold that have come in.  I took my short, after dinner walk around the library grounds, which are beautiful.  The grounds are more beautiful in non-winter times, but it was good to have a change in scenery for my after dinner walk.

And now, it's time to get ready for the second day of class.  Will we meet in person tomorrow?  There's snow that will be swirling around the area, but it's hard to know its impacts yet.

Prayers for Healthy Choices

While I set New Year's intentions, they aren't usually wildly different from year to year:  there are health goals and creativity goals and spirituality goals.  Most years, my sister joins with me on one or more.  We often adopt a word or phrase for the year.  This year, it's an advertising slogan, but we like it:  "2026:  The year that incremental becomes monumental."

This year, we've got some additional people trying to make incremental health changes that will become monumental.  I sent out this e-mail this morning, and because I like the prayer, I wanted to include it here:

"I wanted to let us all know that I prayed for us this morning, and I'll do so every morning. Some times, it helps to know that someone prays for us. It's a simple prayer:

Give us the strength to make healthy choices, the wisdom to forgive ourselves for past unhealthy choices, and the courage to go forward.

Peace be with us all!"

Snow that Sticks Around (but not Yesterday)

Yesterday I headed across the mountain to preach and preside at Faith Lutheran, in Bristol, Tennessee.  I was expecting a clear day.  Much to my surprise, there was snow.  Happily, it was on the way back.

When I parked the car at the church, I texted to my spouse (sick at home) that it looked like snow.  I laughed at myself--I often think it looks like snow, even in the middle of summer.

There was no snow on the ground as I went to Bristol, but the time I drove back, the mountains were dusted with snow.  Across various vistas, I could see bands of snow moving across the landscape.

It was the best kind of snow, the kind that swirled through the air but didn't really stick around to pose a danger.  We may get the other kind of snow later this week.  I have decided to wait before working on my sermon; I'm expecting that we will cancel worship on Sunday, because the Bristol weather forecast calls for snow midweek and then again on Saturday.

The forecast here, roughly 2 hours south, is more mixed.  Maybe it will snow, maybe not.  One of the weather apps isn't calling for snow at all, while another calls for two inches.  And will that affect school in Spartanburg?  We will just have to stay tuned.

Border or No Border? (A Quilt Question, not a Geopolitical Question)

Yesterday, after writing about quilting, I laid the quilt blocks that I've made from Thanksgiving until early January across the bed.

In some ways, they're a bit too busy, so I separated them to see if having a border around each square would be better.

I worry about a border, because I was creating quilt squares with the thought that they'd be together in a crazy quilt kind of pattern.  I'll keep adding to the pile as I keep pondering.

Quilting Timelines

I have been up for awhile, my brain ping-ponging around creative projects.  Let me describe it so that I remember.

I woke up thinking about what I want to work on during Quilt Camp in March and what needs to happen in the two months between now and quilt camp.  I thought further ahead--Quilt Camp in March is not the only one.  There will also be one in August and one in November.

I thought about the timeline that I need to keep to have the Christmas quilt done for my cousin's first child as a graduation (from high school) present; I want to have it ready by Thanksgiving when I see her again.  What background fabric should I get?  Then I remembered that I already bought some backing fabric back in March when JoAnn Fabric was first having their going out of business sales.   

I thought about the log cabin quilt that is close to being ready to quilt; I've sewed the remaining squares and need to turn them into a long strip and attach it to the quilt top.  Maybe I want to finish that one in March.  If so, it's time to think about backing fabric.  I'll make a back big enough to do a fold-over binding.  I could create the back and assemble/quilt at Quilt Camp in March.

I felt a momentary sadness because I didn't get backing fabric during the 20% off sale at Asheville Cotton Company--then I remembered that the sale doesn't end until January 16.  I may head over on Tuesday and see what I find.  Why not today?  The rain pounding on the deck in the pre-dawn dark makes me think it's a good day to stay put.

I went online and saw a woman's crocheted "temperature" blanket, and I wondered about creating something similar this week in fabric:  red/pink fabrics for warmer weeks and blue/purple fabrics for cooler weeks.  And then I laughed at myself.  I have more than enough projects to keep me busy for the next few years.  My cousin has two more children who will be graduating.

If I give a quilt for high school graduation, what about college graduation and weddings, if those events happen?  Let me leave those questions for later years.

First Day Back: Workshops and Hot Meals

Although I was very tired by the end of the afternoon, yesterday was a good first day back at Spartanburg Methodist College.  Classes don't start until Tuesday; yesterday was a day for a very short meeting, four concurrent workshop sessions, and two (two!) real meals--not cold food in a box, but buffet meals of hot food with options that showed that everyone's dietary needs could be met.

Many of us have worked at other places, so we know that we've got a good situation; there wasn't  grumbling about having to report to work yesterday.  Plus, we've had a nice, long break, and most of us can look forward to a summer off.  Throughout the day, I reflected on my pre-administrator days, when I thought that having 3 weeks off was luxurious, and I never had a summer off.

The workshops were interesting, with ideas that I could actually use.  I also went to the 2 workshop session on strategic planning/visioning, which I liked, even though I know that many of our good ideas won't be implemented.  But they won't be implemented because we had so many of them, not because no one cares.  

That session ended with an interesting question:  if the school got 10 million dollars, what should the school do with it?  Ten million isn't life changing money for an institution.  Our newest building, built in 2012 (I think) cost 12 million.  But it's not no money either.  I thought that was a fascinating way to frame the question and to help us think about priorities.

I returned home tired, but it was a good tired, not the "I hate my life" tired.  I woke up several hours earlier than usual, which was another aspect of yesterday that left me tired.  I thought that I would get syllabi finished, but I didn't.  That turned out to be a good thing, as I made adjustments to my English 102 syllabus/approach during the day.

Today I go back to campus for a shorter day.  Again, it doesn't make me angry, the way it might have done in my 20's or 30's.  On the contrary, I feel lucky to be in a place that encourages us to take real time away, which leaves us refreshed and ready to do the work of the school.

A Few More Snippets from Winter Break

As I head back to a more regular work schedule, let me capture a few last snippets that I haven't so far.

--As we traveled, we saw a lot of wildlife.  Of course, we often see a lot of wildlife, a lot of dead wildlife by the side of the road.  But Christmas Eve, as we drove back across the mountain from Bristol (TN) to Arden (NC), we saw a wolf.  You might ask how we knew it was a wolf and not a dog/coyote/fox.  It was a large animal, with a face that wasn't like a fox or a coyote.  It was far from any house where a dog might have gotten out of a fenced yard.  We also saw an eagle on our trip back from Williamsburg.  At first I thought it was your average vulture, but it had white wings and a white head as it swooped up away from the road kill he had been eating.

--Our neighborhood group put together a dinner for a group of retreat staff who are meeting at Lutheridge this week.  I was pleased with the amount of help I got.  I didn't take a picture of the 3 lasagnas (a Stouffers lasagna with meat, a homemade one with chicken, and a homemade one with roasted veggies), the bags of salad, the loaves of bread, the homemade banana pudding.  But I did get a picture of the Kings Cake that I made (recipe in this blog post) and that my friend decorated:

--When we were in the resort in Williamsburg, we had great fun transforming leftovers from a restaurant meal into more meals for the smaller group of family that vacationed from December 31-Jan. 2.  We went home with risotto and pasta and 14 garlic rolls.  We used garlic rolls so that we didn't have to go out to get bread for lunch; it went well with our hummus and carrots.  The risotto and pasta were the base for our meal on January 1, along with some additional shrimp that we brought to cook.  Delicious!

--When winter break started, I didn't know that I had a melanoma, so I didn't know I would spend part of the holiday having a melanoma removed.  Here's the site just after the biopsy in early December:

And here's how it looked with the steri-strips in place:

I'm glad that the melanoma surgeon warned me that the site would look lumpy because he always stitches underneath.  The stitches will dissolve and the arm will smooth out.  Here's how it looked yesterday, January 6, a day warm enough to walk in a sleeveless shirt:

--We've had whiplash weather all break, from very wintry weather (but no real snow) to very balmy weather, with record breaking warmth on Christmas Day and much of this week.  If I lived here all by myself, it would be just fine with me.  My spouse is much more grumpy when it's cold, so I'd be happy if our current spring weather meant we never went back to wintry weather.  

--Before yesterday, I might have written about how I didn't do much poetry writing, but Tuesday, I came up with a pretty good rough draft.  I saw the foggy weather and thought about the early December forecast for freezing fog, and came up with an interesting Epiphany poem.

--Even if I haven't done a lot of writing, I've done a lot of quilting.  My spouse and I made 4 quilt tops for the local Lutheran group that creates quilts for Lutheran World Relief.  I made a lot of log cabin squares for my cousin's oldest child who graduates next year.  She loves Christmas, so I'm using all Christmas fabrics.  Here's what I will remember when I think about this winter break:

--I have really loved the fiber optic lighted tree in the above picture.  I love it every year, but this year, every morning I turned it on when I first got up in the pre-dawn hours.  I turned off the other lights in the front living room/kitchen, except for the stovetop light.  It has been SO beautiful.

--I have loved having time to see friends and family.  The lack of lots of time to see friends and family is the one drawback to my teaching and preaching schedule.

It's been a great winter break, and while that fact can make it hard to go back, it also makes me grateful.

Last Day of Winter Break

Today is the last day of winter break, although it will be a slow re-entry back to my teaching life schedule at Spartanburg Methodist College.  

Tomorrow we have a day of faculty meetings and workshops--and breakfast and lunch!  The world is divided into two types of people, those who understand why I am so thrilled to have breakfast and lunch that the school provides and those who don't see it as a big deal.  I spent years of administrator life arguing that if we required faculty to be on campus all day, we should provide them food, snacks at the very least.  If we weren't going to do that, we would need to give them a real lunch break, at least 2 hours, if we thought they'd all go out and get their own lunch nearby.  Most of my fellow administrators, almost all of them not exactly pro-faculty, thought I was unreasonable:  these faculty should be grateful to have jobs at all!

Unlike some years in the now more distant past, I don't mind going in for a day of meetings and workshops.  On Friday, we have a morning of meetings.  Again, it's fine with me.  It would be even more fine if my commute was shorter, but that's on me.

This morning, I was a bit gobsmacked by realizing how long it's been since I've been a full-time faculty member returning from winter break:  that would be early January of 2007.  After that, I was an administrator, and I would find out what it meant, truly meant, not to have had enough time away.

Today I'll continue getting ready to go back to my full-time schedule:  some organizing, some laundry, some syllabi creation.  I also need to work on my faculty annual report, but I'll do that after getting syllabi for Tuesday classes ready.

It's strange to think how some of these requirements, like the annual faculty review form, used to drive me crazy, but now I'm not disturbed at all.  Part of it is that I'm older, and I understand that much of the world works this way, with some annual review and assessment as part of ongoing full-time employment.  Part of it is that I've worked at places where it was all performative and no one ever looked at these laborious forms; at my current job, we get extensive written feedback on our annual reports, from everyone from our department chair to the provost.  The provost has a face to face meeting with every full-time faculty, which I've never experienced in any work setting I've ever had.

While I never want to go back to dealing with assessment and accrediting the way I did as an administrator, that experience, too, helps me understand why we need to do some of the things we do as a department and a school.  I am happy to pitch in.

And to be honest, these requirements don't take much from me.  The annual report will take an hour or two to write, but the writing comes naturally to me.  The faculty workshops always give me a nugget or two--or more--that I can use.

Part of it, too, is that I have had a generous break.  I left campus for Thanksgiving and haven't been back.  That week after Thanksgiving, I worked remotely so it felt like the first week of winter break, even though it really wasn't.

Yesterday my spouse asked me if I was looking forward to going back to work.  I said that I wasn't dreading it, the way I had in past years--and that is a gift.  I'm happy to be able to recognize it for the gift that it is.

A Poem for Epiphany

As I look back through my poetry folder, I'm surprised to see how many Epiphany poems I have.  I've always found the liturgical year and holidays to be fruitful places for inspiration, and Epiphany is particularly rich.  You've got a new star, wise people from a distant land, a murderous dictator, a baby whose story we already know, and various types of knowledge (observation, dreams, ancient information).

I often read T. S. Eliot's "Journey of the Magi" as Epiphany approaches; this year, Ross Douthat posted a reading which I like even better than my own internal voice reading the poem.  That reading sent me back to my poetry folder, and today I'm posting this poem which draws inspiration from Eliot's.  It was written about 10 years ago, and this appearance is its first publication.

Dispensations Old and New



The old dispensation cannot save
you now. Hard and bitter agony.
Eat stones for breakfast, crack
your teeth before sunrise,
it makes no difference.
Suckle the camels who cannot eat cactus,
wait for the silken girls with their sherbet,
No one will sing to you.

You must listen to a different song.
Plug your ears against the angel chorus.
Put away the mandolin and fiddle.
Listen for the star’s quiet plainsong.
Follow the single note.

Leave death’s twilight kingdom.
Enter the deep midnight,
the place you hoped
would be a temporary sojourn.
Learn the new landscape with only
your fingertips for navigation.

Houses of Dynamite

I spent the week-end watching A House of Dynamite, which I've wanted to see since it came out.  At last, we had a moment and seized it on Saturday.  It was so well done that I wanted to see it again, to see the artistry of it, once I had the plot figured out.

In some ways, it was strange to be watching a movie about the launch of a nuclear missile during the week-end of the U.S. invasion of Venezuela.  It might have been better to watch Missing, which is about U.S. intervention in Chile or maybe Salvador about U.S. interference in El Salvador.  

Watching A House of Dynamite also made me want to revisit the nuclear war movies of my youth:  The Day After, Testament, and Threads.  But I am resisting--there's only so much of this that I can take and maintain my equilibrium.

It was interesting, though, seeing the very realistic sets of A House of Dynamite and reflecting on the sets of Threads and The Day After, especially the military bases and government operations.   The technology is both updated (all those computers!) and old-school (the siloes that house the missiles, the hatches that cover the siloes).  Then as in the 1980's, I think about all the money spent on weapons, what else it might have been used for.  But I also know that some of that technology had additional purposes, like our laptops and phones that might not have been invented otherwise--weather forecasting equipment too, that keeps us safer.

A House of Dynamite also had wonderful shots of the D.C. area, which gave me that twist of time feeling.  It made me think of the D.C. of the year that I lived there in seminary, but also the D.C. of the 1980's.  In some ways, they are very different cities, and I thought about how long I've loved that city, but how it is unlikely I'll be spending much time there again.

But who knows.  Five years ago, Wesley wasn't even part of my awareness, although it was about to be.  Life takes interesting turns.

Snippets from the Last Holiday Week Away

We spent the week between Christmas and New Years Day with my parents in Williamsburg.  My spouse and I arrived on Saturday, and other family members arrived on Sunday.  We were at my parents' place until Tuesday, when we packed up and went over to Ford's Colony, the Marriott resort in Williamsburg.  My mom had Marriott points that would expire at the end of the year, and we agreed that it could be a fun change of pace.

It was!  It felt like being away, and yet my parents didn't have the travel time that they usually do when we go anywhere at the holidays.  We did a few resort kind of things, like playing Bingo.  But it was really too cold to do much, like get out and walk the trails or go swimming.  I've already written about some of the things we did instead, like watching Chariots of Fire and going to see a Vegas-style magic show.

Let me capture a few other elements of the Williamsburg part of our winter break before they slip away.

--Before we left, on Christmas night, we watched Too Hot to Handel:  A Gospel Messiah.  It was amazing, both on its own and as a way to finish Christmas day and transition to surgery day.

--I've written several posts about my December 26 surgery.  Here's the short version:  I had a shallow, wide melanoma that had to be removed in a hospital.  The surgery went well, and the recovery was easier than I expected (not much in the way of pain or bleeding or interfering with daily life).  The tissue got sent to pathology, and the report came back:  "Clear margins."  Hurrah!

--A week ago, the Sunday after Christmas, we decided to do church from a distance.  My mom and dad and I watched the worship service of Lessons and Carols at home.  There was a moment where my mom was changing clothes in the adjacent room, and my dad and I were singing "In the Deep Midwinter."  I thought about Christina Rossetti who composed the poem which provides the words for the hymn.  I thought about how I've taught her poetry in my literature classes and how I used the hymn for a seminary assignment.  And then I thought about how remarkable it is to be singing it with my dad, he in his 80's, me just turned 60.  I want to remember that moment.

--We had lots of intergenerational engagement, which was grand.  At one point, we played pool in the Billiard room as we waited for everyone to get packed for moving over to Ford's Colony.  I couldn't play because of my arm surgery, but happily, we had others.  The younger generation mentioned having a games night.

--On our last night together, we tried a game that one of us got for Christmas, where there are gibberish words on a card with clues, and all the participants try to make sense of them.  That was mildly amusing but ultimately frustrating.

--One of the younger members suggested Charades.  One of us pulled up a Charades app on the phone, and we had an amazing hour of acting out words.  Happily, it wasn't complicated:  the app chose words that we all knew, like Bride or Fishing.  We were all able to play, from the teenagers to the elders in their mid-80's.  We all stayed engaged for hours, and it was the kind of treat that was all the more incredible, since we all knew what a gift it was.

Clear Margins

Yesterday as we drove back from Williamsburg, my cell phone rang.  I was driving, and my spouse was sleeping, so we didn't answer the phone.  Then his cell phone rang, which woke him up and made me wonder if there was bad news we needed to know about sooner rather than later.

We got the message left on my cell phone; it was a nurse from the melanoma doctor's office who was calling to "discuss the pathology report."  I exited the interstate so that we could call back from a parked car.  If it was bad news, I didn't want to be driving.  It was 4:00 on a Friday afternoon, so I didn't want to delay making the return phone call.

Of course, the nurse was with another patient, so I left a message.  We switched drivers and made our way back home.  The minutes ticked on while we waited for the call.  I wasn't anxious that we wouldn't get a return call, and I wasn't too anxious about the nature of the test results.  I figured that the worst case scenario was that the doctor didn't get it all, and we'd have to do it all again.  Since it hasn't been too bad an experience, that, too, wouldn't be terribly awful--unlike say, if I had to undergo my broken wrist experience again.  I knew that the pathology was on the tissue removed, not anything that would reveal cancer elsewhere: it's not like they did a body scan of some sort while I was undergoing surgery.

Still, it was a relief to hear the nurse say, "Your margins came back clear."  And yes, I clarified, even though I was fairly sure what she meant--they got all the melanoma.  

I feel very lucky, since it's possible that the spot has been there since summer 2024, when it was diagnosed as a bug bite.  It did look like a bug bite, and it's possible that it was, and that the melanoma came in the same spot.  But it's also possible that we missed it for over a year, which means it had that much longer to grow deep and become more dangerous.

Last night, the steri-strips came off my surgery site.  I went home with the site covered in gauze and waterproofing plastic, which we took off 3 days later.  But the steri-strips hid some of the starkness of the surgery.  The melanoma doctor did warn me that it would be lumpy, but I was expecting something like the lumpiness of cellulite, not skin that looked like two ping pong balls had been inserted on either side of an indentation.  

The stitches are underneath and will dissolve, which means there will be less scarring and eventually no lumps.  Happily, it's my arm, not my face, so I'm not too worried.  I'm relieved that there's no bleeding and no pain--not even any discomfort.  I'm trying to remember that I am supposed to take it easy in terms of lifting for the next week (no lifting of anything over 10 pounds).

Let me stress again how lucky I feel.  It could have been so much worse.  It's not how I anticipated spending part of my winter break, but here, too, I'm glad it unspooled during December, instead of other times that would have been much less convenient, like last summer when I was working a full-time CPE internship at the VA Hospital.

Watching "Chariots of Fire" on New Years Day

Yesterday was a great beginning to 2026.  It was a cold day, so we weren't interested in some of the outdoors things we might have done on a milder day.  My parents had been planning to watch Chariots of Fire, and I like that movie, so we decided to have a movie day.

We've all seen the movie before, and we were all surprised by how much we've forgotten.  I thought I had seen it in the years since it came out, and I saw it in the movie theatre.  But now I wonder.

I did remember the main characters, of course.  But I had forgotten how principled both men are.  Eric Liddle stands out, of course--his decision not to run on a Sunday, even though it means he won't actually get to participate in the Olympics, is the part of the movie that many people remember.  The other main character is also making a principled stand by working with a coach to get even faster, even though he's already one of the fastest students ever.

I had forgotten how wonderful the other aspects of the movie are.  What amazing costumes!  What wonderful settings!  And that soundtrack--I hadn't forgotten how wonderful the soundtrack is.

As always, the movie made me think about trying to run again.  Or maybe it's just the soundtrack that has that effect on me.  The running I want to do is not the 100 or 400 yard sprint.  I want long, rambling runs, and I've always run at a very slow pace.

For now, I just need to get back to walking, which I will do, once we get back to more of a semblance of regular life.  My arm is healing nicely from the melanoma surgery, so I can soon return to some weight/strength work.  Let me use the movie as inspiration for 2026, as I look for ways to regain good health.  I'm not far off from good health now, but I am carrying some extra weight--probably another pound or two since early December, but what a wonderful holiday we've had!

Intentions for 2026

Here we are, the first morning of 2026.  We did not stay up until midnight, but we did have champagne after watching my dad's alma mater, the University of Michigan, lose to some school in Texas.  We did some coloring on coloring sheets we made ourselves.  We did not talk about resolutions.

This morning is the time for me to set intentions.  I have four.  Careful readers of this blog might say, "Didn't you have three intentions that you couldn't keep for 2025?"  

I appreciate the power of New Year's Day intentions that tug at me all year long, even if I'm not entirely successful.  This year, I'll have 2 writing intentions and 2 health intentions.  

Writing Intentions

--I'm going to keep one of my intentions from 2025.  Here's what I wrote last year:  "I am not feeling OK about how many poems I am not writing. I do a good job of writing down fragments and inspirations, but I'm also aware that I have fewer inspirations and fragments in the past year or two than has been usual. I want to end the year with 52 poems written, finished poems. They may not be worth sending out, but they need to be finished. Fifty-two poems gives me space to catch up, and space to have a white hot streak that sets me ahead."

--Always hopeful about having a book of poems with a spine, I also plan to create a new collection of poems, with the title Higher Ground.

Health Intentions

--I can no longer find the article that recommended taking a walk after dinner, even a short walk.  I wanted to doublecheck the benefits that the article discussed, but no matter.  For four or more days a week, I want to take a walk after dinner, in addition to the other exercise I get through the day.  It can be a very short walk (the article talked about how the benefit was in the going out and doing it, not in the distance covered)--the goal is to get out of the house and get moving before settling into a chair for the evening.

--I thought about having 2026 be the year I gave up alcohol altogether.  But I realize this about myself:  if I tell myself I can never have something ever again, I often end up consuming more of it.  So, in 2026, I want to have 300 days of no alcohol consumption.  That gives me 65 days where I could drink.  And to be sure that those days aren't days of excess consumption to make the most of them, which often happens when I give myself a splurge day of any kind, I'm going to say that if I limit myself to one drink, that day counts as a half day, not a full day.

So, let's see how I do.  I'm excited about these intentions.