The Softer Grief of Autumn

--Today we start a new quarter at my school.  Some years, we've had a restful break.  This year, I feel like I've had no break.  Usually I use the break between classes to get caught up or maybe even to work ahead.  This year, I worked at a fever pace to get ready for our upcoming accreditation visit.

--I wonder what tasks I've neglected in my fever pace.

--Usually by now, I might have sent out dozens of poetry packets.  Sadly, I have done very little in the way of submissions this season.

--Today I am thinking about my friends from school days past and school years present.  I am missing them.  I am wishing we had time to brew a pot of tea, time to make pumpkin muffins together.

--I am wishing we had the cooler weather that makes me want to make pumpkin muffins.

--This morning, I tried to remember the name of my high school best friend's sister.  She had a Biblical name which she shortened to something much more American and 20th century.  For a few minutes, I couldn't remember, and I felt sad.  Then it came to me:  Miriam, shortened to Mimi.

--I won't likely ever find Mimi, however.  She got married, and I don't know her married last name.  I'm not sure that our modern social media means of finding people have solved that issue.

--I want to find her primarily to share sadness that my high school friend died too soon.  Maybe it is good that I can't find her.  She might not want that kind of encounter.

--Or maybe it would make her feel less alone in the time of mourning that often emerges out of nowhere once we're through the piercing time of grieving.

--What is autumn but a symbol of that time of softer mourning?