Thursday, November 12, 2020

November Gratitudes, in an Attempt not to Feel Irritated

I have been awake since about 2 a.m.  I got up around midnight to turn the AC down.  It was 78 degrees, and the thermostat was set at 77.  I thought it was odd, but I hoped that the AC would kick on soon, because I had turned the thermostat down to 74 degrees.

Two hours later, and nothing had happened.  I fiddled with the thermostat some more, but with no expectation that the AC would kick on.  The AC has not kicked on.

Wait, that's not true.  Strangely, around 4:45, the system did kick on, but no cool air (or air of any temperature) came through the vents.  And then, 5 minutes later, the system shut off, as if it had done its job and could rest.

And yes, I see the metaphor here.  How often am I resting, thinking I've done my job, but having moved no air through the vents? 

Of course, it's hard for me to rest, as the house gets more humid, so I just went ahead and got up.  I knew I had lots of grading to catch up on, and so, I did.  I also did some laundry.  I played with an idea for a poem--I started with a negation of a line, "The heart is not a lonely hunter."  I can't decide if the poem has potential, so I'll put it aside.

Am I being the AC right now, thinking the work is done, but needing to do a bit more?  Have I not even done the work at all?

It is November.  I am trying not to think about the fact that it is November, and I am still having to think about the AC.  But at least tropical storm Eta didn't circle back around and hit us again.

It is November, and I am feeling gratitude about a tropical storm.  And it is November.

November.

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